I couldn't wait til noon break....

[plumtreeblossom]

I just need to say this:

Marshall's, through whatever secret sources it possesses, manages to gather the very ugliest shoes on the face of the earth and bring them together in one place. I swear unto you, look no further than Marshall's on Boylston if you happen to be costuming yourself as Hideous Resort Lady or Aging Cowgirl Prostitute.

I chose the sandals that least offended me, which are black and have a butch gladiator-girl look to them. I look ready to battle lions in a coliseum, but really I'm just glooming in my cubicle. $34.99, for fooke sake. At least they're dry. Like all sandals with a toe-split, they will break in one month and it will happen when I'm on an all-day outing somewhere with no place to buy replacents, and I will flap-flop behind the group and whine and everyone will wish I hadn't come along.

Thank you, Marshall's. You help me get my rant on every time.

Comments

[desultor.livejournal.com]

i guess your work is not near dsw, alas! i've never been a fan of the gladiator sandals, too bad they were your only choice!

[plumtreeblossom.livejournal.com]

I could have gone to Lord & Taylor, if I wanted to spend $100, which I didn't. These were the only pair I was even willing to touch, let alone put on my feet. I actually don't hate them -- they'd look really hot with a pair of baggy boy shorts and a Speedo sports bra. But they look utterly fucking bizarre with business casual.

[desultor.livejournal.com]

it's the new fashion look, a business casual fighter-to-the-death.

[plumtreeblossom.livejournal.com]

Okay, that's my new superhero:

BUSINESS CASUAL WARRIORESS

My cross-bow shoots sharpened pencils!
I can slay giants in Excel!
My 3-hole punch will take you OUT!

[quilla.livejournal.com]

ahahahahah, i love the sheer implausibility of all of those. except the cross-bow. i'd be cowering in front of that one. would have to be giant pencils though, eh? the kiddie kind, but heavier.

[oneagain.livejournal.com]

deep belly giggling ensued

[quilla.livejournal.com]

oh dear. i feel your pain! having to look at distasteful sandals is bad enough, but being forced to choose a pair?

[plumtreeblossom.livejournal.com]

Drop in there some time since you're in the neighborhood, just for the shock value -- racks and racks of lime green and feathers and fake jewels, all on sandals. Drag queens could shop there. At least this pair doesn't have glittery charms dangling from the ankle strap, though they do have metal studs!

[quilla.livejournal.com]

i'm not actually in the naighbourhood, but i have been to that one, and i've been to the Marshall's here in the DC/MD/VA area, and hoo boy. they've got nice deals on clothes if you have the time, but some of that stuff... you wonder "what store did this come from? i mean, who thought this was fashionable - EVER?"

[trowa-barton.livejournal.com]

Were there clear heels?

[plumtreeblossom.livejournal.com]

There were heels wrapped in fuzzy string. Fuzzy. On heels. Oh, the Russian Dutchess is coming back to

**SPIT!**

[nepthytis.livejournal.com]

Do they also have the tackiest handbags ever? Because of course you'd want to coordinate the look...

[plumtreeblossom.livejournal.com]

I didn't even look, but I'm sure they do. Everything in there is ugly. Once I was desperate for an umbrella, and they only had two choices: blinding yellow paisley or puce (I chose puce). The blouse I'm wearing now is the only thing I've ever gotten there that I liked and wanted, not had-to-buy. Still, I end up in there for one reason or another about once a month. Marshall's is an unpleasant truth about my life.

[quilla.livejournal.com]

the most perfectest icon ever. my love for the clinton and the stacey floweth as the river.