Those Hellbound Heterosexuals
Jul. 27th, 2007 01:17 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Last night at intermission I was sitting outside on the church steps, not yet in costume (for long-distance readers, Theatre@First is housed in a very liberal, non-evil church). A young male-female couple walked by me, and the male gave me a reproachful sort of smirk/sneer. Then he stopped and pulled his woman in to him and started making out intensely with her. It was a very deliberate show, clearly meant to shock the "Christian" lady on the church steps.
Guess he didn't see the Church's queer pride flag over the front entrance, or the big sandwich board announcing that a play was happening inside. My cigarette was all gone, so I just put it out and went on inside. No doubt he thought I was fleeing to the sanctuary of My Lord and Savior, to beg that these lascivious sinners be cast posthaste into the sputtering cauldrons of Hell, and that triumph was his for successfully offending the Christ-centered sensibilities of a nicotine-sucking church spinster.
As always, on the spot I failed to come up with anything witty to say in reply. But when I told some Firsties inside what had just happened, it was
big_jewfro who came up with exactly what I should have said:
"Can I join in?" ;-)
Guess he didn't see the Church's queer pride flag over the front entrance, or the big sandwich board announcing that a play was happening inside. My cigarette was all gone, so I just put it out and went on inside. No doubt he thought I was fleeing to the sanctuary of My Lord and Savior, to beg that these lascivious sinners be cast posthaste into the sputtering cauldrons of Hell, and that triumph was his for successfully offending the Christ-centered sensibilities of a nicotine-sucking church spinster.
As always, on the spot I failed to come up with anything witty to say in reply. But when I told some Firsties inside what had just happened, it was
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
"Can I join in?" ;-)
(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-27 05:31 pm (UTC)I'm sure the cast of The Kiss would have been happy to consult on the proper way to make out with someone.
I mean, um, sinners! Sinners all! Let us all turn to the praying mantis for their salvation.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-27 06:38 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-27 05:41 pm (UTC)Happens to me all the time. Just not quick enuf.
Oh, well.
Wonder what they'd have done if you applauded?
(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-27 06:39 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-27 07:40 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-27 05:41 pm (UTC)Out of curiosity, is that what non-Christians generally think Christians do? Fundies aside, such behavior is antithetical to our beliefs.
—
Oh, and not only should you have offered to show them the right way to do it, a gesture towards demonstrating on the young lady would have been priceless. ;)
(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-27 06:47 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-27 07:34 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-30 05:42 pm (UTC)Amy, I hereby bestow +5 religion-scholar points upon you. Well said.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-27 05:54 pm (UTC)It's always strange when someone is trying to get a rise out of you and is both A) Obvious and B) Completely Inept.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-27 06:49 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-27 08:03 pm (UTC)"5.5 from the Russian judge: inadequate tongue presentation"
naah, I wouldn't really have come up with that in time either...
(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-27 09:58 pm (UTC)Critique is the perfect reply. Nice work, Chris. :)
(Hey, y'know what, I saw a similar scene outside that door last week, now that I think about it (more casual kissing, though). I found it odd so just sat there watching and laughing until they walked away. I wonder if it was the same people.)
(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-27 06:41 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-27 06:53 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-27 09:06 pm (UTC)About how old were they — maybe 14? :-)
(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-27 10:25 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-07-28 02:00 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-08-01 11:20 am (UTC)"Can I join in?" ;-)
Better: "Hey, she's really cute! May I join in?"
Just sayin'.