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plumtreeblossomThis is a little Public Service Announcement to MEN, which I’m not putting behind a cut because I want you to read it. Here we go...
Now men, you like meeting someone attractive at a party just as much as we do. You enjoy the chatter, savor the flirtation, muse upon the oh so intriguing possibilities. We’re all on the same page with that. So here’s what NOT to do if you want to get the girl.
Lets just say you’re talking in the crowded kitchen with a hottie who’s caught your interest. You’ve already gotten beyond the "oh my God we have so much in common lets spontaneously kiss" phase and are rapidly moving towards more promising ground. She’s obviously digging you. You’ve brought her out to a quiet and dimly lit corner of the porch for some "get to know you" time and you have her undivided attention. You move your thigh so that it touches hers and she lets you – in girl body language this means extremely good things. Prospects couldn’t be better.
Then your cell phone rings. Now there’s nothing wrong with answering a cell call so long as it’s not during sex or a fight. But when that call is from a girl you gave your number to 6 weeks ago and she’s only just now calling drunken at 1:00 AM, it’s a really, really bad idea to start into a conversation while the first girl is sitting right there next to you. It doesn’t go down well at all when you try putting your hand reassuringly on Girl A’s knee while saying to Girl B "Where did I meet you again?" and "Well yeah I wanna see you again." Bad idea, pal.
You’ve heard the expression "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush." Keep that in mind the next time you have one very interested girl sitting right next to you and another one slurring on the phone whose face you don’t even clearly remember. You’d best end that call ASAP – call her back tomorrow if you want, but get off the phone NOW. Because what will Girl A do after a civil 3-minute wait? GET UP AND WALK.
She may also do things like send you up the flagpole in her public blog and laughingly dismiss you as a player. In the end, players never win.
****
Interesting – last week I met someone who was nice but who was attracted to me for all the wrong reasons, and whose needs are almost a perfect opposite of my own. Still, there is a huge measure of good in these connections. I’m finally learning to say "no" when someone doesn’t or can’t meet my needs, or when I’m being treated poorly. Believe it or not, I’m only just now finding it within myself to establish those boundaries and make them clear to myself and others. It’s been a long time coming, but it feels like finally being free of my own compromises.
Cell Phone Heroes aside, last night was great fun. The spaghetti party was a blast with a weeks worth of leftovers, and the after-party at Robotica’s was as wild as always. It was wonderful having people over again now that summer is gone. More of these have to happen soon.
Now men, you like meeting someone attractive at a party just as much as we do. You enjoy the chatter, savor the flirtation, muse upon the oh so intriguing possibilities. We’re all on the same page with that. So here’s what NOT to do if you want to get the girl.
Lets just say you’re talking in the crowded kitchen with a hottie who’s caught your interest. You’ve already gotten beyond the "oh my God we have so much in common lets spontaneously kiss" phase and are rapidly moving towards more promising ground. She’s obviously digging you. You’ve brought her out to a quiet and dimly lit corner of the porch for some "get to know you" time and you have her undivided attention. You move your thigh so that it touches hers and she lets you – in girl body language this means extremely good things. Prospects couldn’t be better.
Then your cell phone rings. Now there’s nothing wrong with answering a cell call so long as it’s not during sex or a fight. But when that call is from a girl you gave your number to 6 weeks ago and she’s only just now calling drunken at 1:00 AM, it’s a really, really bad idea to start into a conversation while the first girl is sitting right there next to you. It doesn’t go down well at all when you try putting your hand reassuringly on Girl A’s knee while saying to Girl B "Where did I meet you again?" and "Well yeah I wanna see you again." Bad idea, pal.
You’ve heard the expression "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush." Keep that in mind the next time you have one very interested girl sitting right next to you and another one slurring on the phone whose face you don’t even clearly remember. You’d best end that call ASAP – call her back tomorrow if you want, but get off the phone NOW. Because what will Girl A do after a civil 3-minute wait? GET UP AND WALK.
She may also do things like send you up the flagpole in her public blog and laughingly dismiss you as a player. In the end, players never win.
****
Interesting – last week I met someone who was nice but who was attracted to me for all the wrong reasons, and whose needs are almost a perfect opposite of my own. Still, there is a huge measure of good in these connections. I’m finally learning to say "no" when someone doesn’t or can’t meet my needs, or when I’m being treated poorly. Believe it or not, I’m only just now finding it within myself to establish those boundaries and make them clear to myself and others. It’s been a long time coming, but it feels like finally being free of my own compromises.
Cell Phone Heroes aside, last night was great fun. The spaghetti party was a blast with a weeks worth of leftovers, and the after-party at Robotica’s was as wild as always. It was wonderful having people over again now that summer is gone. More of these have to happen soon.
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(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-10 10:15 am (UTC)I'm so glad I'm no longer dating :-)
(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-11 06:10 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-12 01:01 pm (UTC)-- One whose cellphone bleeped at Just The Wrong Time (tm) and who can't bear to respond on the 'wrong reasons' and 'perfect opposite' remarks.
I still believe a thing should be done because it is a right and good things, reasons be damned and Beckett notwithstanding.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-10-13 03:24 pm (UTC)