So Very Wrong

[plumtreeblossom]

Every single dating-strategies-for-men website or column I've ever read has been chock full of advice that would send this woman screaming for the hills or slamming doors in faces. I don't know who is writing them, but they sure don't know how real women respond to manipulative behavior and just plain rudeness.

I just took an online dating test for men, and I answered exactly how I, as a woman, would want a man to behave/act in each scenario. I failed the test! The answer key explained why.

Don't call/e-mail her for a week after the first date. Don't accept an e-mail address instead of a home phone number. If she won't kiss you on the first date, dump her; she's not interested. Use a homely woman to attract a gorgeous woman.

I am willing to wager money that no lesbian dating book suggests these things.

Every one of these would be grounds for dismissal in the very early stages of dating with me, with very few exceptions (if you get hit by a bus after our date, you don't have to e-mail me within a week of our date). I have to wonder what these date-flailing men who spend hundreds of dollars on books and "systems" to get more hawt babez think when some bitch like me says NO to a 2nd date after being told "You can reach the salt just fine yourself." In some cases I see multiple levels of material that the men have to continue buying to ensure success, but to sell it, the company has to ensure early failure. I don't see this bad behavior much in the poly community, but someone in the mono world is gettin' scammed.

I should get a panel of women together and write a real dating advice book for men. Advice directly from the intended target, not some aging Love Doctor who's arbitrarily (and profitably) decided that women put out for men (or women) who treat them like crap. I know otherwise. ;-)

(Working title: You Want A Date? You Can't Handle A Date!)

Heh, between me and my girls with dating experience, we probably have a collective 300 years of experience and advice to give.

I can remember personals ads dates where I was quite sure one of those strategic systems was being used on me. I wonder if they thought "WTF, I paid $200 for that set of dating tapes" while watching my backside exiting Starbucks.

Comments

[plumtreeblossom.livejournal.com]

I do NOT understand why some girl hasn't scooped you up already. Somewhere out there there's a punk rock Catholic girl who likes beer and super-nice guys like you. It's a matter of finding her. Do you have any personals ads up? If not, I would totally help you write some, or if you do have some I could do some consulting to see if we can figure out why you're coming up empty-handed. Jimmy should not be womanless.

I wish they all could be...

[http://users.livejournal.com/urban_faerie_/]

Punk rock girls.

Wait... who is this who needs a date!?

HOLDON! I *know* a hot punk rock girl who likes beer and needs a nice boyfriend! she's one of the coolest people I know. She's a devout athiest though. Is that a problem?

Re: I wish they all could be...

[plumtreeblossom.livejournal.com]

I don't know if the Athiest thing is a problem (Jimmy would have to answer, but I KNOW he drinks on Sundays...)

Jimmy is a young old-school punk with a heart of pure gold (You'll see --< LJ user=jimmystagger>). You joined T@F too late to meet him, but he did tech for a few of our shows and won many hearts with his sweetness and coolness and love.

He needs a 20-or-early-30-something alterna-punk-chick with whom to raise alterna-punk-babies. He's ready, enthusiastic, family-oriented as only Irish-Americans can be, yet COOL and bursting with reasons why people who DON'T abdicate their personhood upon breeding should breed.

Re: I wish they all could be...

[http://users.livejournal.com/urban_faerie_/]

Well... the girl I'm thinking of is my sister. She's 24, briliant, an artist and designer, a RISD graduate, and in the last 5 years she's probably photographed just about every major Boston punk band from the mosh pit. And she does it all while looking cute.

I don't think she's ready to be raising punk rock babies.. but as many people know the guys in that scene can be assholes and she could use a punk rock boy who will treat her right.

The only drawback I can see is that if he's any less than perfect to her I'll have to kick him in the junk, and I do my best not to kick people my friends are friends with in the junk.

Plus, we might have to "accidentally" set them up because she might find it too dorky to have her lame older sister introduce her.

; )

Re: I wish they all could be...

[jimmystagger.livejournal.com]

Uhm, hi. I'm Jim. The punk rocker aforementioned. No I don't have any problem with someone being an athiest. I don't force my beliefs on others. I'm a lapsed Irish Catholic, which is to say I don't attend Mass and have problems with the Church but still consider myself part of it and try to live up to the parts I do like (service to the poor, living a good life, etc).

I'm a nice guy. Check out my myspace page for more on the man they call Jimmy Stagger

http://www.myspace.com/jimmystagger

or shoot me an email at knowyrproduct@netscape.net

I am not opposed to blind dates!

And thanks.

Oh and hey, I'm an older brother with two younger siblings I zealously over-protect. I undertstand the nut-kicking impulse and applaud it. As one older sibling to another, I'm OK.

Re: I wish they all could be...

[http://users.livejournal.com/urban_faerie_/]

WOW!

You get major points for allowing a near stranger to discuss your love life in a public forum and threaten to kick you in the junk. I took the liberty of stalking you to My Space and I can see you two already like a lot of the same bands. Let's see if we can cook something up! I'll be in touch.

Re: I wish they all could be...

[plumtreeblossom.livejournal.com]

I can testify that Jimmy is one of the nicest and coolest guys I know, with puppydog energy and a million funny stories to tell. I would date him myself if I weren't his mom's age. Even if your sister only goes out with him once, he will keep her entertained and treat her like a lady AND a peer.

Re: I wish they all could be...

[jimmystagger.livejournal.com]

Hey chief, my life has been discussed by near-strangers in my presence before. I call them T @ F parties and by the end those people are my friends.

Oh and just to clarify, I'd like a family ONE DAY but not annnnyyyyyytime soon.

I look forward to hearing from you and thanks....

[jimmystagger.livejournal.com]

I would really appreciate any assistance you could render me chief because I am bloody sick and tired of being single. Send me an email, I lost your #!

knowyrproduct@netscape.net

we'll get together for some beers at your casa, also so I can pet Skunky and Rowley!